There are weird sex toys, and then there are WEIRD sex toys. A teddy bear that’s also your go-to pleasure product seems to fit well into the latter category.

Teddy Love is a full-sized teddy bear whose muzzle houses a “robust” 10-speed motor — to do what else? — power the built-in vibrators. And if you think this is about to get any weirder, you’re about to wish you weren’t right about where those vibrators are located.

The nose touches the clitoris, and the tongue goes into the vagina,” Teddy Love CEO Dawn Harmon explains in a video posted on the company’s
Indiegogo campaign page. “The controls are in Teddy’s ears, making him the ultimate listener. And you are in full control — he can sit facing a woman while doing his job, leaving someone else’s hands free to do other naughty things.”

Definitely unlike anything we’ve seen — or wanted to see before, Harmon sells her “novel, first-in-class product” on four unique qualities that she thinks make Teddy Love a real game changer in the adult toy industry: It’s discreet and blends in with other household items, it’s not intimidating to buy compared to other adult toys, t’s “so cute and lovable” that you can just fall right asleep after using it, and — of course — those handy ear controls that keep Teddy so… out of the way…

The company behind Teddy Love launched an Indiegogo campaign on June 16 with a goal of raising $50,000 by August 15 to put the product into full production. According to Teddy Love’s Indiegogo page, the adult toy has been accepted by “the largest retail chain” in the United States with 58 locations nationwide and will begin getting shipments by September for sale.

Teddy Love’s design was developed by Sonos Models Inc., a company that has created toys for brands like Mattel, Hasbro and Leap Frog.

Contribution options begin at $20 up to $449, and Harmon promises a certificate of authenticity to the first 2,500 recipients of Teddy Love — you know, just in case you were afraid of getting the even shadier Teddy Love knock-off.