It’s not even debatable that this is the greatest welcome speech in the history of welcome speeches. There is literally no way that any person, anywhere could top this. Let’s recap. He had all the basics covered. First, he quoted Isaac Newton, which was an absolutely dynamite way to start. Quoting Isaac Newton is about as fail proof as you can get.

Next, he told a group of engineers that if they wanted to build the Iron Man suit, that they could do that. What engineer hasn’t thought about trying to build the Iron Man suit? And finally, he referenced himself and his theme music during his bad ass speech. There was absolutely nothing missing from the speech, it was all around amazing. Before this speech he probably didn’t have a great amount of luck with the ladies. Now that his speech has gone viral this dude’s going to be fighting off women with a stick. We may actually find him suffocating under a pile of women in those little yellow hats you saw towards the end. By the way, how do I get myself one of those little yellow hats? I feel like you haven’t lived until you’ve walked around in public wearing on of those.

Steve Armato

Hailing from Staten Island, NY, Steve is 24 years old. He attended Sacred Heart University in Fairfield, Conn., where he graduated with a degree in media studies. While at Sacred Heart, Steve also played Division 1 baseball for four years. He enjoys writing about sports and humor and loves watching and quoting movies. Many also consider him the best bartender in New York City, but that’s up for debate.

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