Some people just have money to burn. For people who just can’t find a way to spend their money fast enough, there are frivolities like gold toilet paper and a diamond chess set. Here are 17 absurdly expensive versions of things we commoners have been buying for much, much cheaper.

$1.2 Million Toilet Paper Roll

Australian company Toilet Paper Man has created the world’s most expensive roll of toilet paper using 22-karat gold. “As you use the toilet paper 22 carat gold flakes will fall onto the floor and your behind taking you to another level of sophistication.” The website assures potential buyers that the roll is completely safe to use. For a price tag of $1,376,900 AUD, or about $1.23 million USD, it better be safe to use.

$60,000 Bottle Of Water

The Acqua di Cristallo “Tributo a Modigliani” was the world’s most expensive bottle of water, fetching $60,000 at auction. The bottle itself was handmade glass covered in 24-karat gold. The water was a blend of natural springs water from Fiji and France along with glacier water from Iceland. The 1.25 ml bottle contained 5mg of 23 K gold dust in the water. Proceeds from the sale went to a foundation fighting global warming.

$800 Beer

Australian beer company Nail Brewing made 30 special bottles of beer in 2010 using Antarctic ice. Thought to be the world’s oldest and purest beer based on the water, a single bottle sold for $800. Proceeds were donating to an ocean conservation charity.

$250,000 Shirt

Datta Phuge, an entrepreneur in India, commissioned this $250,000 shirt made of pure gold. He says the 7-pound top is the ultimate status symbol.

$2,300 Hot Dog

New York City lounge 230 Fifth created the world’s most expensive hot dog, priced at $2,300. The 12-inch hot dog spared no expense, including truffle-enriched, marbled Wagyu beef, white truffle butter, and saffron-infused ketchup.

$1.47 Million Pen

The Aurora Diamante fountain pen costs $1.47 million, and just one is made each year. It’s covered in De Beers diamonds and has an 18-karat solid gold nib.

$250 Popcorn

The most expensive popcorn in the world is covered in gold flecks and goes for $250 per gallon. Thrifty shoppers can save by buying in bulk: a 6.5-gallon tin only costs $1,000. What a bargain!

$408,000 Sunglasses

I’ve never paid more than $10 for a pair of sunglasses, but $408,496 seems reasonable. Swiss luxury brand Chopard created these sunglasses with 51 River diamonds totaling 4 carats in weight.  They also had 60 grams of 24-karat gold.

$2 Million Champagne

This is one liter of Dudognon Heritage Cognac Grande champagne with an alcohol content of 41 percent. It comes in a bottle dipped in 24-karat yellow gold and sterling platinum, with 6,500 certified brilliant cut diamonds.

$600 Coffee

Kopi luwak coffee beans have been eaten and fully digested by a small animal called a civet. The enzymes alter the chemical makeup of the beans, supposedly making them extra tasty when they come out the other end. The coffee will run you $600 per pound or $50 for a cup.

$1,188 Socks

These socks are made of wool from the vicuna, a llama relative with an especially soft and warm coat. Only 10 pairs of the socks were for sale, for $1,188 per pair. A matching vicuna pullover, of which 20 were made, would cost $3,300.

$1,060 Cupcake

The Golden Phoenix was offered by Dubai’s Bloomsbury’s Cupcakes for the equivalent of $1,062. Made of edible gold and the finest chocolate, the pricy cupcake was served on a 24-karat gold cake stand.

$565,000 iPod Dock

The AeroDream One is an 11-foot iPod dock with a built-in ladder, five amplifiers and a hefty price tag to match. Customers can choose from chrome, black or white docks.

$9.8 Million Chess Set

This Royal Diamond chess set is made of gold and platinum and is valued just under $10 million. It has diamonds, emeralds, pearls, rubies and sapphires built in and took 30 people to create.

$1.3 Million Stool

This pure gold stool weighs a whopping 110 pounds and is valued at $1.3 million.

$100 Toothpaste

Theodent 300 toothpaste costs $100 per tube. It contains an extra-large dose of Rennou, a proprietary blend of a chocolate extract with other minerals that help to strengthen tooth enamel.

$30.8 Million Book

The Codex Leicester was a notebook written by Leonardo da Vinci and contains a mixture of sketches and writing. It was purchased by Bill Gates in 1994 for $30.8 million, or about $48.4 million adjusted for inflation.